Data's Jokes
50 Reasons Why It's Great To Be A Woman
50 Reasons Why It's Great To Be A Woman
- Free drinks.
- Free dinners.
- Free movies (you get the point).
- You can hug your friend without wondering if she thinks you're gay.
- You can hug your friend without wondering if YOU'RE gay.
- You know The Truth about whether size matters.
- Speeding ticket? What's that?
- New lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life.
- You never had to walk down the hall with your binder strategically positioned in high school.
- If you have sex with someone and don't call them the next day, you're not the devil.
- Condoms make no significant difference in your enjoyment of sex.
- If you have to be home in time for Melrose Place, you can say so, out loud.
- If you're not making enough money you can blame the glass ceiling.
- You can sleep your way to the top.
- You can sue the President for sexual harassment.
- Nothing crucial can be cut off with one clean sweep.
- It's possible to live your whole life without ever taking a group shower.
- No fashion faux pas you make could rival The Speedo.
- Brad Pitt.
- You don't have to fart to amuse yourself.
- If you cheat on your spouse, people assume it's because you're being emotionally neglected.
- YOU never have to wonder if your orgasm was real.
- You'll never have to decide where to hide your nose-hair clipper.
- No one passes out when you take off your shoes.
- If you think the person you're dating really likes you, you don't have to break up with them.
- Excitement is only as far away as the nearest beauty-supply store.
- If you forget to shave, no one has to know.
- You can congratulate your teammate without ever touching her butt.
- If you have a zit, you can conceal it.
- You never have to reach down every so often to make sure your privates are still there.
- If you're dumb, some people will find it cute.
- You don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
- You have the ability to dress yourself.
- You have an excuse to be a total bitch at least once a month.
- You can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
- If you marry someone 20 years younger, you're aware that you look like an idiot.
- If you're wearing cologne, you don't have to pretend it's aftershave.
- You'll probably never see someone you know while peeing in an alley.
- You'll never have to punch a hole through anything with your fist.
- You can quickly end any fight by crying.
- Your friends won't think you're weird if you ask whether there's spinach in your teeth.
- There are times when chocolate really Can solve all your problems.
- You've never had a goatee.
- Gay waiters don't make you uncomfortable.
- You'll never regret piercing your ears.
- You can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
- You'll never discover you've been duped by a Wonderbra.
- You don't have hair on your back.
- You know which glass was yours by the lipstick mark.
- You get to hate Kathie Lee in the way only another woman truly can.
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