Data's Jokes

Application To Live In New Jersey


Application To Live In New Jersey

NAME:__________________________
NICKNAME:______________________

ADDRESS: ______________________      EXIT # __________
         ______________________

ETHNIC BACKGROUND: _______Italian   _______Sicilian   ________Jewish

BACKYARD SMELLS LIKE:
a)Sewage           b)Sulfur        c)Garbage       d)All of the above

TOTAL NUMBER OF MUSCLE SHIRTS
a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

TOTAL NUMBER OF BON JOVI TOUR SHIRTS
a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

TOTAL NUMBER OF BON JOVI TOUR SHIRTS THAT ARE ALSO MUSCLE SHIRTS
a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

BRAND OF JEANS PREFERRED
a)Sergio Valente   b)Jordache      c)Sassoon       d)Z. Cavaricci

PERCENTAGE OF WARDROBE WHICH IS LEATHER
a)100%             b)95-100%       c)90-95%        d)85-90%

TOTAL NUMBER OF GOLD CHAINS OWNED
a)10 - 15          b)15 - 20       c)20 - 25       d)25 and above

TOTAL NUMBER OF GOLD CHAINS WORN AT ONE TIME
a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

APPROXIMATE VALUE OF ALL THIS JEWELRY
a)$ 5 - $10        b)$10 - $15     c)$15 - $20     d)Stolen

GOLD CAP ON AT LEAST ONE TOOTH?            YES          NO

HAIR HEIGHT
a)6 - 8 Inches     b)8 - 12 Inches  c)1 - 2 feet   d)More than 2 feet

HAIR PRODUCTS USED AT ANY GIVEN TIME
a) Hair Spray
b) Styling Gel
c) Mouse
d) Extra Hold Styling Gel
e) Bondo
f) Spackle
g) 40 Weight Oil
h) Crazy Glue

AUTOMOBILE OWNED:
a) IROC Z
b) Firebird
c) Camaro
d) Mustang
f) Chevette ( You got a f#%*ing problem with it?)

NUMBER OF INCHES CAR IS OFF THE GROUND
a)6 - 8 Inches     b)4 -6 Inches   c)2 - 4 Inches  d)Under 2 Inches

CHARACTERISTICS OF AUTOMOBILE
a) Gold chain around license plate
b) Neon lights around license plate
c) Neon lights under car
d) Chippendales/Playboy air freshener hanging from rear view mirror
e) Garter hanging from rear view mirror
f) Chrome hubcaps
g) Stick-on window tinting
h) Stick-on paint splash stickers
i) Fuzzy dice

FAVORITE SPORTS TEAM
a) F#%*ing Giants
b) F#%*ing Jets
c) F#%*ing Mets
d) F#%*ing Yankees
e) F#%*ing Nets
f) F#%*ing Knicks
g) F#%*ing Devils
h) F#%*ing Rangers
i) F#%*ing Islanders

FAVORITE MUSIC
a) Techno
b) Rap
c) Bon Jovi
d) Bruce Springstein

ESSAY QUESTION

In 100 words or less, Define the term "Yoose Guys"


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